If you are considering divorce, you may be pondering on what you have heard or read about it. Divorce features in so many articles, movies, and person-to-person conversations that it can be hard to separate the truth from fiction.
Here are three of the most frequently propagated falsities you may hear:
It has to be confrontational
Courts have realized that it is usually better to try and keep a divorce as simple and amicable as possible. They would rather couples come to them with suggestions on how to move forward than come to them complaining about the other person.
There is certainly still a need for litigious divorces – such as when one spouse is manipulative or abusive, but in most cases, you are better off trying to reach an agreement than score victories over each other.
Mothers hold the upper hand in custody negotiations
Mothers once held an advantage in custody negotiations. People, including judges, thought they were better at raising children than dads. In part, it was down to how often that stereotype played out in the household – dad went to work, and mom stayed home to cook, clean and look after the kids. As times have changed and fathers have taken an increased role in raising their children, courts and legislators have come to accept that mothers should not have any automatic advantage over fathers. You’ll start off on an equal footing.
Children will be worse off if you divorce
Parents often believe they should stay together for the sake of their children – at least until they are older. While there are advantages to that, the harm children could suffer if staying together results in continued exposure to interparental warfare may vastly outweigh the benefits.
Sometimes, it is better to end a marriage for everyone’s sake. If you are ready to do so, consider learning more about what steps to take.
